A True Proverbs 31 Woman

I’m not going to lie.  These past few weeks have not been what I would necessarily call “good weeks”.  On top of the regular load of meetings and study, there has just been a lot of standing with…and crying with…people who are struggling.  Whether that struggle is with sin or with their own mortality, the struggle is real.  There have been lots of long nights and limited family time over the course of the past few weeks.  Then there was the unexpected death of someone I had a great deal of respect for.  It’s been a “walking through the valley” period.  And yet through it all, there have been two constants that remained-the presence and peace of the Lord and Lacie, the love of my life.

So in today’s edition of the blog, I thought that I would just write a little about Lacie, just in case you didn’t know just how wonderful she is.  She is, without a doubt, the best gift that God Almighty, in His infinite wisdom, chose to bestow upon me.  How underserving I am, yet not a day goes by that I don’t thank Him for placing her in my life.  Besides the Lord, Lacie has always been the constant in my life.  No matter what storms were or are happening in my life, I take one look at her, and I instantly remember that as long as she is waiting for me when I walk through the door, things can’t really be all that bad. 

We were high school sweethearts.  I was 18, and she was 17 when our best friend Jess introduced us.  I still remember the first time I saw her and thinking, “My goodness, that’s the deepest shade of red hair I’ve ever seen.”  It’s certainly served her well.  You know what they say about ladies with red hair.  It’s usually assumed that they have a fiery spirit to match the hair.  Well I can certainly attest to the truthfulness of that assumption.  I suppose that after fifteen years with me plus the addition of three kids, it’s kind of a requirement for the job.  It’s funny though.  The thing that first really attracted me to her is the same thing that still attracts me to her now.  Her laugh.  Oh that laugh.  If you know Lacie, then you know which laugh I’m talking about.  Not that fake one she’s doing to be polite, but that one that seems to start at her toes and works itself up to her lungs.  The one that threatens to cut off her breathing.  After all these years, there is still no one I’d rather laugh with.  I remember one of our friends telling us “Y’all look like y’all have so much fun together.”  Indeed we did.  Indeed we do. 

Not that things have always been easy.  On the contrary, there have been some unspeakably, indescribably tough times, but through it all, we have kept looking to the Lord, and as a result, we knew that we were never walking through the valley alone.  When we got married, our pastor told the congregation that “Lacie doesn’t always say much, but when she speaks, people listen.  Truer words about Lacie have never been said.  She is soft spoken by nature, but she carries herself with such dignity and charm that people just kind of flock to her, which is fine by me.  It’s often been said that behind every good man is an equally good woman.  I’m not sure that applies in our case because Lacie has never been a step behind.  Whenever we walk into a room together, I always feel like President John F. Kennedy when he said, “I’m just the man who escorted Mrs. Kennedy to Paris.”  I’m just the man that escorted Mrs. Cox to wherever it was that was we were going that particular day.   

She always knew that I was going to be a pastor.  She knew before I did.  One day, she told me that the Lord told her that she was going to be a pastor’s wife.  My reply to her was something along the lines of “I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I’m kind of going into politics.”  Her response was “we’ll see”.  Fifteen years later here we are.  I’m a pastor.  A while back, I asked her what she would have done if I never became a pastor.  She simply looked at me and said “I knew it would happen.  I just decided to sit back and wait for you to listen.” 

By the way, what a pastor’s wife she is.  She’s not the one who will play the piano and organ, direct VBS, chair the hospitality team, and lead children’s choir.  She very much prefers to be behind the scenes.  She has always said that her primary ministry area is that of wife and mother.  Everything else comes after that.  She manages our home and schools our children seemingly so effortlessly and still manages to bake things for the church function of the week, all the while watching church members’ children so they can tend to their business.  I am in awe of her. 

I guess what I’m trying to get to is that the Lord has blessed me with the quintessential Proverbs 31 woman.  This is what Proverbs 31:10-17, 25-31 says about finding a wife of noble character:

 a]A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.

 
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.

26 She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

 

How incredibly blessed and eternally grateful I am to have found a Proverbs 31 woman like her.  I am a better pastor and a better person for having Lacie Renee’ Stouff Cox in my life.  Men, do you have a Proverbs 31 woman in your life?  If so, do they know how grateful you are for them?  Do you tell them?  Tell and show your spouse just how grateful you are for them.

I love you, Red!
 
 

 meandlace

Until Next Time,

JP